The weekend in review....
Another good weekend. Haired down the road on friday after work for a wedding reception in Gourock Golf Club. There's a fantastic view over the Clyde from the clubhouse although it was obscured at times by the sideways sleet and rain that was howling about the place. We drank, danced and were merry until the early hours and then bought small carry out and heading up for some more drinking, worse dancing and further merriment in one of our friends flats.
The taxi home brought more excitement as we ran out of cash to pay the taxi man once we got back to my fiancée's parents house. Now let me make this bit clear: the taxi bill was about £6.30 and I had just under £5 in change on me. No big deal. My fiancée would run into the house and grab a couple of coins and we'd be fine. But could grumpy arsed taxi man deal with this? Oh no, the eejit had to spend the 2 minutes while we waited mouthing off about me and my fiancée and throwing out snidey comments like "So did you raid your piggy bank tonight boy!". This guy had some chip on his shoulder and I had made up my mind to let him know what I thought of him. My fiancée returned, I gave the man his money and then got out of the car with my well thought out parting shot of "Cheers here's you money and thanks for being such a pr1ck about it".
Well, I must have found the guys trigger word coz he blew his top and went mental. I turned around to see him storming out of the car and charging across the pavement in my direction with steam literally coming out of his ears. Quick mental arithmetic (How big am I plus how young am I multiplied by how pissed off I am divided by How drunk am I with roughly the same calculation for him) put the odds slightly in my favour so I reckoned squaring up to him was the best course of action. I was proved to be right as he came to a screeching halt in front of me when it looks as though I wasn't going to run away. He thought for a few seconds and then grabbed the front of the jacket but his mental arithmetic hadn't factored in my fiancée coming flying in for an attack on his blind side and pushing him back towards his car.
"but...but he called me a prick?" he stammered angrily
To which we both hurled a torrent of expletives in his direction until he got the message and hopped back into his taxi and f*cked off.
We walked back to the house hand in hand. Victorious but tired.
The taxi home brought more excitement as we ran out of cash to pay the taxi man once we got back to my fiancée's parents house. Now let me make this bit clear: the taxi bill was about £6.30 and I had just under £5 in change on me. No big deal. My fiancée would run into the house and grab a couple of coins and we'd be fine. But could grumpy arsed taxi man deal with this? Oh no, the eejit had to spend the 2 minutes while we waited mouthing off about me and my fiancée and throwing out snidey comments like "So did you raid your piggy bank tonight boy!". This guy had some chip on his shoulder and I had made up my mind to let him know what I thought of him. My fiancée returned, I gave the man his money and then got out of the car with my well thought out parting shot of "Cheers here's you money and thanks for being such a pr1ck about it".
Well, I must have found the guys trigger word coz he blew his top and went mental. I turned around to see him storming out of the car and charging across the pavement in my direction with steam literally coming out of his ears. Quick mental arithmetic (How big am I plus how young am I multiplied by how pissed off I am divided by How drunk am I with roughly the same calculation for him) put the odds slightly in my favour so I reckoned squaring up to him was the best course of action. I was proved to be right as he came to a screeching halt in front of me when it looks as though I wasn't going to run away. He thought for a few seconds and then grabbed the front of the jacket but his mental arithmetic hadn't factored in my fiancée coming flying in for an attack on his blind side and pushing him back towards his car.
"but...but he called me a prick?" he stammered angrily
To which we both hurled a torrent of expletives in his direction until he got the message and hopped back into his taxi and f*cked off.
We walked back to the house hand in hand. Victorious but tired.
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